I looked lifeless on my seat, sweat all over my body. If my eyes weren’t wide opened I would have said I had just dreamt. The man of God had been on the pulpit while I thought he had come to my seat and called my name. The message was loud and clear. It was the truth I needed to hear.

I derived pleasure from an act didn’t mean it was from God. That God still watched me and hadn’t punished me for my sins didn’t mean I had been pleasing him. That he had not exposed me didn’t mean he loved what I did. Masturbation is a sin. It is bad. It is unholy and shouldn’t be heard among humans! Not even me, a Christian.

I was jolted out of my remorse by the song the minister of God used to round off his sermon. Once again the Congregation was quite. Some were on their knees while some were crying. The song was really worth the spiritual drama if I may call it that. I joined in the song. This time with all I have got, I sang it loudly crying at the top of my voice. I felt so empty I wouldn’t last a minute except Jesus came to my rescue

“My heart is open to Thee, dear Lord,
Come in, Come in,
My faith is clinging to Thy dear word,
Come in, Come in:
Come not to tarry, but stay, dear Lord,
All shall be Thine love can here
in my heart ever make Thine abode
Come in, Come in”.

Even if the minister of God hadn’t made an altar call that day, I had been called to repentance at the foot of my Lord. I had an eternal encounter. I wouldn’t waste God’s grace upon my life anymore. Addiction is never an addiction until the doer accepts it as one and gives himself as a slave to it. No more excuses for sinning against God and demoralizing myself. I am breaking away from masturbation.

I stepped forward with a number of others in the church for prayers and rededication of life. It was indeed a blessed day for me. I felt reunited with the Father. No more running, no more shame, no more fears.
I waited behind to speak with the man of God. I needed a spiritual mentor and here I have found one. If one man had brought sorrow and eternal damnation to my life, thank God another man had come to my rescue. Uncle Joe didn’t just introduce me to a wretched world of sin, he had caused my spiritual backwardness.

Luckily for me, the minister of God was willing to help me in prayers and follow up. I was given some spiritual exercises that would empower me and get me deeply rooted back in Christ. Part of the exercises was what I just did. To gladly share my experience for the purpose of assuring you of Father’s love to you and his eagerness in seeing you break forth from your secret sins.

I am glad to witness Christ to you, a sure way to be a captive is to accept the defeating life of addiction, while its antidote is to come to Christ Jesus and open up to him who is able to save. I really hope you have been blessed. See you in my father’s world of purity.



Your friend,
Temidayo Adebisi,

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