You have been wracking your brain about this idea of “Mr. Right.” Love is a tricky area. One thing that is on your mind lately is the way media, television and film portray women. The values that have been promoted since the advent of the moving picture have sent a message to women.
In commercials, women are most often in a kitchen. Men are most often at an office or on a couch. What these messages deliver are pretty obvious. In television and film, the primary conversations that women have revolve around men, dating men or how to better date men. Male characters’ conversations are often about catching bad guys. Again, these messages are pretty transparent. Advertising is purposeful and manipulative. Millions to billions of dollars are spent on how to sell a costumer something they don’t need to buy, or portray an image they don’t necessarily want to subscribe to.
When you were a young girl and having a hard time dating, your mother would say, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs in order to find your Prince.” Now, you have come to a point in your life where you realize that she was right, but, as corny as it may sound, the Prince is you.
You have been through many “wonderful” love affairs; and you have been through divorce and near-death illness; you have travelled the world and been on the covers of magazines. Through all of this, you have come to understand that you—only you—control your ultimate happiness. You are the reason that you are still alive. You are the reason you will continue on.
All this may sound super new-agey and self-possessed, especially if you are one so decidedly against anything remotely feminist. Yet you can’t help but fall back on that old maxim, “happiness comes from within.”
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-AKINSANYA ADENIYI AYOSOJUMI