For most people in a relationship, they can behave in a certain way at the beginning of the relationship and as time goes on, there seems to be a switch in personality. Although they are still the same person, what is seen is another personality in the same body. More often than not, this is as a result of the fear of rejection
What Fear of Rejection Really Means
Fear of rejection is a well-documented, persistent and irrational fear of being socially excluded from a pack (this is when considered from an evolutionary stand point quite sensible) or being ostracized from society – Psychology Dictionary
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When it comes to relationships, an individual suffering from fear of rejection might become quickly overwhelmed. Rather than such individual taking out time to get familiar with the other person, fear and worry begins to set in regarding whether or not he or she will be accepted by the other party.
The Real Person VS The Fearful Person
Although the phrase ‘staying true to oneself’ cannot be overemphasized, some people still find this challenging
True love can never be found while basking in the comfort of someone else’s shadows
The real person is your true self; that being that wants to do all the crazy things possible; the epicenter of your entire being and the sum total of everything you are.
The fearful person is that one who fears being rejected and as a result takes on a totally different personality; the one that will be accepted..or so you think.
How the fear of rejection affects people in a relationship
When a person has fear of rejection, he or she never feels safe in a relationship as thoughts of being rejected becomes the order of the day. For such an individual, there really isn’t safety in the relationship as constant thoughts of being abandoned by the partner springs up; even when the partner isn’t harboring any such thought or intention.
Giving way too much
Fear of rejection causes its victim to dish out way more than is required for a healthy relationship. This is because the person feels giving even when it’s not necessary will help secure the relationship. The end point of such action is usually disastrous. You find it hard to say no even when saying yes is detrimental to you as a person
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The mere fact that you’re living out a life that is not you and was never you to begin with makes you phony; and by being phony, you reveal to your partner a being that is completely different from who you truly are. On the long run, this has a negative impact on your relationship.
Although there are many more effects of the fear of rejection on a relationship, this is where I will draw the curtain. However, before I do that, I’ll really love to hear from you all.
How does the fear of rejection affect a relationship? Kindly join the discussion
Written by Alara Karis of ASK BLOG